Stella Dare makes memories for people she will never meet.

Dare, who lives in Palmyra, learned to sew when she was 11. When her daughters were small she made their clothes, and she continued sewing simple items over the years. So when her daughter Mary, a nurse with VITAS Innovative Hospice Care® of New Jersey West, suggested that her mother might like to make a “Memory Bear,” Dare was intrigued.

Memory Bears are sewn by a VITAS volunteer from a piece of clothing provided by the family of a VITAS patient who has died. It could be a favorite nightgown, a T-shirt, a well-worn sweater, a robe—something important for the memories it invokes, but perhaps not ideal for making bears. That’s where the creativity of the seamstress comes in.

In the past year, as a craft volunteer for VITAS, Dare has crafted multiple bears for grieving families. One bear takes her about four hours to create, and begins when she lays the garment out on her sewing table and envisions how it will work with her to become a Memory Bear. She tries to use the buttons, ribbon, lace or other trim in order to bring the whole garment to life for a grieving family member. When a young woman died, Dare was asked to make a bear from the woman’s wedding gown. She carefully cut the white satin from the bottom of the skirt, hoping to preserve the rest of the dress for the family.

“It gives me a great feeling,” Dare says of her volunteer efforts. “I know I’m helping someone, because they chose the garment and requested a Memory Bear. I know my bear will bring them comfort.”

In fact, after she’d completed bears for several grieving families it occurred to Dare that she and her daughters might like Memory Bears fashioned from her husband’s clothes. After 53 years of marriage, Howard Dare passed away seven years ago. So she created three bears from a treasured blue plaid dress shirt. She even made a cap for one of the bears because “my husband always wore a cap.”

Dare never meets the recipients of her bears, but she includes a note with each. Sally Mackie, manager of volunteer services at VITAS, says the nurses usually deliver Memory Bears to families, with heart-warming results. They hear comments like, “Now I have something to hold on to,” and “I don’t want to put him down!” After an especially gratifying moment with a family member, one nurse came back and reported to her team, “We are doing such a wonderful job!”

“It’s little extras like that,” says Mackie, “that make the whole team feel good. Memory Bears give a sense of well being to more than the patient’s loved ones. That feeling can spread thorough the whole staff.”

Stella Dare, who is in the midst of selling her home, announced that she was taking a bear break in order to sort through 53 years worth of possessions. “I’m very busy,” she insists, then sighs. “But I always find time to make bears.”